Hectic Splat Zones (12-6, Tri-slosher)

15th July 2017 – 7.00 am

Heading around the side for some quick flanking action works better when I don't flop against some uninked wall. Even so, there's no one at the top when I get there. I decide to go even further around the side, and bump in to an inkling immediately, and we dance around a block for a bit. She moves backwards, I move forwards, and she gets splatted. That'll do.

I continue with my plan and get a textbook splat on the charger on his perch. Nice! I don't linger either, and head back up the top, where my squidmates have taken charge of the Splat Zones and look to be holding them well. The orange ink starts coming back soon enough, and the E-litre 3K's laser sight sweeping across us, so I get moving again.

I miss the inkling squidding over the wall, but am heading back towards the chargers perch anyway. He's gone, but moving on fluidly lets me catch an orange inkling tidying up behind her. But where's the E-litre 3K? Splatted already maybe. Either way, the Splat Zones need attention, and there's a Mini Splatling causing problems up there, who I don't really deal with effectively.

I get as high as I can, which doesn't prove too effective, and am glad to be wearing my waistcoat that clears Echolocator more quickly, but I'm in no position to fool the orange team. Their Specials all seem to come together, and Burst and Suction Bombs come flying my way, forcing a temporary retreat. But the Burst Bombs keep coming. Bubbler to the rescue!

With new-found confidence inside the Bubbler, I press forwards, under the Burst Bombs, and in to orange ink. A Disruptor and a neat jink bags me two splats, and a third comes with a bit of luck at being missed by the charger. Better yet, the Splat Zones are neutralised. I don't stick around the capture them, but press the inkling advantage by hitting the flank. That doesn't go too well.

Hitting the side, along my wavy ink, so nearly catches the E-litre 3K by surprise. Instead, I get myself surrounded. That could have been better. A squidmate hangs around better, and super-jumping to them doesn't get me immediately splatted. I try not to be too careless, and take a longer route to the action. That still gets me mixed up in orange ink, but canny use of the available contours and a timely Bubbler keeps me safe for long enough to make a bit of a difference.

The battle still looks to be hanging by a threat, but my squidmates capture the Splat Zones and give the orange team a buffer to work through. That helps! A Suction Bomb Rush looks threatening, but I push through it for a nice double-splat, stopping the Rush and inking the Splat Zones, before the Mini Splatling reppears. At least I Disrupt her, but her Burst Bomb Rush almost negates that. Aww.

I super-jump back, and nearly splat the Carbon Roller from below. Sense should dictate I withdraw, but as she is Echolocated I am feeling confident. It's misplaced confidence, as it turns out, but never mind. As the battle enters extra time, the orange team have only a small buffer to work through, and a handful of points after that to snatch the victory.

I super-jump back as the fight for the Splat Zones goes in to overdrive. The E-litre 3K is doing his best to ink turf, but that makes him vulnerable to my Tri-slosher. And it looks like we have some last-second inking superiority. With one orange inkling left, and all four of us available, the Splat Zones turn teal once more, and the battle is won. Woomy!

Finding some breathing space in Splat Zones (14-7, Tri-slosher)

14th July 2017 – 7.00 pm

Going one way hits a Suction Bomb, so I turn back to gain some height. That gets some ink some way across the Splat Zones, but my little bucket doesn't have enough reach. Dropping down isn't a bad idea, but getting hit with an Echolocator just as I do it is unlucky. Thankfully, I stay unsplatted for just long enough for my Bubbler to charge. Popping that lets me get two splats, which is a fair trade for what happens when it dissipates.

The green team look to be setting up shop in the Splat Zones. Not even a bit of caution heading down the side makes much headway, and all the time their score continues to count down. Back up as high as I can get, until a misstep drops me down, but it works. My sense of duty once more forces me to close with the Inkzooka, and although I'm splatted, at least I take his attention away from everything else. And we have started to score.

My next entrance perhaps encourages me not to go that way again, plus there's a sea of green ink across our other flank, which is never healthy. I can't quite clear it on my first attempt, but a bit of height and some rotation helps reduce the issue. My squidmates are all doing good work spreading the ink too. Nice!

A well-timed Bubbler saves me from Burst Bombs and replenishes my ink, making me a sloshing machine. I like not being an immediate victim to the Carbon Roller too. A bit of housekeeping rarely goes amiss, but it's harsh running in to the .96 Gal there. Maybe it's time to try the short route again. It actually works. There's some inky pressure around, but some natty manoeuvring and my reliable Bubbler helps me push through it, get a couple of splats, and help recover the Splat Zones.

I take a rare opportunity to squid across to the other side. Sure, it takes me over a super-jumping ring, but I can slosh downwards. But I don't realise the Slosher is to my side, a splat gone to waste. I spy him as I squid back around, and get the bit of luck needed to keep squidding, and inking the green base as they inked ours.

Back-and-forth, helping splat and ink, having the presence of mind to throw my Bubbler in to a Suction Bomb. Getting some height on the green side to be a pest to the inklings coming my way. Finally with some freedom to move around, we keep hold of the Splat Zones quite easily. Woomy!

Overcoming the odds in Splat Zones (5-9, Classic Squiffer)

14th July 2017 – 7.00 am

I've been tempted to use the Squiffer, to see if I can. Naturally, I can't to start with, and as the weapon requires better aim than a blaster and is less safe than a longer-range charger, I'm not sure I'll ever be good with it. But maybe I can bring it out occasionally to remind myself that I can't aim. I should also point out that, since trying it in a few battles, it's been pointed out to me that the Bubbler is mostly useless, as inklings can jink around until it dissipates, which is really obvious to me after seeing that first hand, and that the Fresh Squiffer is a better choice. Good to know.

Hey, look at that! The first splat in the battle is mine, and from a decent reaction shot. That gives me some confidence that, as it turns out, is misplaced, but it's a jolly good start to a new weapon. Yeah, I'm splatted a couple of seconds later, but I can pause the recording to bask for longer. And I can skip past being totally suckered along the side route. Bah.

Back up to the top along a more conventional route, and I push forwards to help ink the Splat Zones. Whilst I'm there, I get another good splat ahead of me, and follow behind with a splat that I am not entirely sure I aimed for. Still, it could be attributed to good awareness. Yeah, I feel confident with the Squiffer after these splats. We also capture the Splat Zones, and I help a bit more by trying to ink over obvious routes up the walls. But not the one used to splat me by a tag-team.

Super-jumping to the Splat Zones works about as well as you can imagine, and heading around the side again gets me close, but bamboozled. The blue team are running rampant over us, and here's me trying a new weapon. It doesn't help that I keep getting close to a seasoned and well-kitted Splattershot. I don't give up though. That pause is having my super-jump target get splatted. A bit like I do, moments later.

The battle is looking stickier by the second. Kudos to my squidmates for managing to find their way past the blue team and capture the Splat Zones from behind. That takes some pressure off us (me), and throws the blue team in to a little disarray. I do what I can to help tidy up, which isn't really required at the moment, but I do track the Bamboozler, and get another good splat from doing so.

I can't quite beat the Carbon Roller for speed, but just being a target outside of the Splat Zones helps, as we manage to take an unexpected lead. Just as unexpected, I splat an active Inkzooka! Sure, the Carbon Roller evades me, but that's okay. The clock runs down, the Splat Zones aren't contested, and the battle is won in our favour. Woomy!

Walking in to bombs in Splat Zones (9-3, Carbon Roller Deco)

13th July 2017 – 7.00 pm

I quite like this side route to the top of Flounder Heights with the Carbon Roller. It gets me in to position quickly and offers a nice long stretch of turf for my Seekers. And, yeah, maybe I get confused about that inkling being on my team, but you have to admire my spirit in trying to splat her anyway.

That Seeker splat is unexpected. I'm mostly trying to ink turf. But I suppose I have a Roller for that, so I hop down and cover the blue Seeker's trail. Whilst I'm here, I push ahead to see what I can do, which is mostly stay out of the Kraken's way, and before you know it I'm on the other side of the divide. Huh.

I head back the other way, thinking we have lost control of the Splat Zones, but all is well over there too. Well, until I stupidly try to squid through a Splat Bomb Rush. At least a squidmate gets the splat, which covers over my own splatting, and returns the Splat Zones to a nice shade of green.

All looks to be going well. The blue team captures one of the Splat Zones, and neutralises the other, but with a bit of luck with my flicking, and being in the right place as the Splatling appears, we re-take one of the Splat Zones. Moving across to re-capture the other goes quite well, considering. I manage to avoid the Splatling, dodge underneath a Splash Wall, and catch a Splat Bomb Rush in progress, bagging two splats. But the other Splat Zone is now neutralised again.

We look to be in a proper battle over the Splat Zones, which should be interesting. We remain mostly in control, but the Splat Zones are being contested regularly now, unlike at the start of the battle. I would probably be more of a help if I always managed to be as sneaky as waiting for the Splatling to get close enough to see the white's of her eyes, but moments later I roll in to a wall with a Splat Bomb next to me. I dunno.

The blue team manage a nice coup by capturing both Splat Zones to give us a significant buffer to work through, but they return to green pretty quickly. I think instead it just gives us more opportunity to look for splats. And sometimes you just need to flick ink luckily at a wall for that to happen, although I did hear some sloshing nearby.

As our buffer runs out and we start scoring properly again, I head across and hide in a corner. I'm looking for inklings squidding up the wall, but it's not inked. A Roller coming up the ramp is good enough, though, but maybe I shouldn't have stayed in the same position after that.

I shout out a 'Nice!' as I return to base, with the battle almost won, but one Splat Zone is neutralised. I squid out, watching both Splat Zones go green again, but once more one is neutralised. I almost make it up the wall to help, but, thankfully for the blue patch just barring my way, my squidmates have everything under control. Woomy!

Rushing to the podium in Rainmaker (1-1, Carbon Roller Deco)

13th July 2017 – 7.00 am

Space gets a bit cramped as we rush out of our base, but that's not why I head to the side. I go that way to see if I can better catch any inklings coming over the wall to flank us, and because my Seekers can work well from over here.

As it happens, someone is heading up the wall, so I move back to prepare for a splatting. But they are quite sensible, and drop down at the edge of my ink. It doesn't really save them, but it makes the splat mutual. Meanwhile, my squidmates are battling over the Rainmaker. I pretty much ignore that for now, going back instead to clean up my mess and prevent the wall climber getting an easy squid to the top.

By the time I've thrown some ink down, amy squidmates are nicely in control of the Rainmaker and half-way to the plinth. Happily, I am in a pretty good position to get to them quickly, thanks to a nice straight path and a Seeker.

I stop short, as we lose the Rainmaker, cautious of what awaits around the corner. Nothing, really. I head around to start inking the Rainmaker's Shield, which meets with surprisingly little teal resistance. No inklings get splatted by the Shield either, which actually doesn't give me a warm feeling.

I suspect the teal team are holding back, ready to ink the crap out of anyone carrying the Rainmaker around the corner. Luckily, my Seeker Rush is charged, so I start launching them ahead. That inks a path, and provides a distraction.

I stop short with the Rush, hoping that the teal team will expect a few more Seekers from me, instead pushing forwards when I think it won't be expected. Whether that worked or not, I can't say, but I do manage to sneak past any attention, right to the top of the podium, which my Seekers inked for me, and dunk the Rainmaker! Woomy!

That was some great early work by my team, and I'm really happy to follow it up to get the knockout victory for us.

Getting pushed back in Rainmaker (13-6, Tri-slosher)

12th July 2017 – 7.00 pm

Dammit, the charger has gone from his perch by the time I get there, probably because the teal team have the Rainmaker. I then spend what feels like ages just looking for another inkling. But at least I find three at once, including the charger. Hopefully that makes up for my starting skirmish-to-nothing. And as a squidmate takes the Rainmaker back the other way, he makes good use of my initial ink, giving us a healthy lead. Nice!

I half-ignore the next teal push. I don't really ignore it, but don't engage the inklings or Rainmaker directly to start with, instead inking turf orange to make their push less straightforwards, and heading around the back to make myself less of a target and hopefully disorientate them a bit too. It mostly works, I would say.

I mostly survive an encounter with a Slosher, probably only because of a Disruptor, and head up and around to recover. That puts me in a good position to splat the Splatterscope looking elsewhere, but not before the Rainmaker is splatted. The Slosher gets his splat on me too. But to show that I learn, I don't rush straight towards the Rainmaker on my return, but try to get around the side.

Maybe I don't splat the Rainmaker, but I help out quite nicely by surprising a new Inkzooka and following-up with a splat on the Splatterscope too. That takes the long-distance pressure off our team, and we recover the Rainmaker. My Bubbler lets me survive far too much ink, and finds two boxed-in inklings, but my jinking doesn't fox the Splatterscope for long enough for me to get close.

I head around the back, knowing that I've inked the wall already, and pause to see what's happening. The Rainmaker is squidding through the middle, but covered by a squidmate. I head across anyway, Disrupting and splatting the Slosher, but somewhat disconcerted by the amount of teal ink everywhere. I try to do something about it, but it's too late. The Rainmaker is grabbed by a teal inkling, who makes good use of the inked turf to squid in to the lead. They nearly dunk the Rainmaker too.

We burst the Rainmaker and try to push back, but the teal team have made a strong position for themselves. Even splatting the owner of a Killer Wail doesn't help too much when I can't move out of the way from being stuck in their ink. And it looks like the teal team are going to use denial tactics, which is frustrating but, I suppose, valid.

I catch up with the Rainmaker, though, and get the splat. But the one time I really want to pick up the Rainmaker and I squid just next to it instead. Maybe I splat the dangerous Dynamo Roller because of that, but I also get stuck on a small step, which is a pain. I get back and manage to grab the Rainmaker, but even this short delay allows the teal team to get more organised.

I don't get far, and certainly nowhere near far enough, before I'm splatted and we lose the battle.

Splatting back in Rainmaker (10-6, Tri-slosher)

12th July 2017 – 7.00 am

Man, I think I've got that E-litre 3K Scope looking the wrong way and Disrupted, ripe for the splat, when he splats me without even looking, thanks to the Rainmaker's Shield. I have better luck with the Luna Blaster casually lobbing Splat Bombs over to us. But then I miss seeing who I assume is the E-litre 3K squidding back past me as I approach from the side. I think I'm lucky to evade another splatting myself, particularly with the Echolocator on. But I don't.

Meanwhile, I've foolishly ignored the Rainmaker's whereabouts, and the yellow team have got themselves a good lead. Stubbornly squidding in to the middle of a Splat Bomb Rush doesn't help, nor really does getting some height when the Rainmaker has already got behind me. I press on, inking turf to feel somewhat useful, and miss the slippery E-litre 3K again, but at least my squidmates have done well to reset the Rainmaker.

I am in the right place to help splat the next yellow push, which goes backwards a bit as well, letting us start in a better position, this time also without the E-litre 3K who I happily bump in to. I bump in to another inkling too, and pop my Bubbler nicely to help survive, and almost get another couple of splats further ahead, but the Luna Blaster's area-of-effect puts paid to my little burst of activity.

Hey, my squidmates take the lead! Nice! I am not there to help directly, but I hope I helped in some way. I pause on my return, thinking I'm probably by myself, but press forwards when I think it's safe to get a splat. Maybe, but not when being the only target for the Rainmaker and standing right in front of it. I'm a bit smarter as I return, holding back and waiting to see what move the yellow Rainmaker makes. I am a bit clumsy in my attack, but thankfully my bucket doesn't mind too much.

The Rainmaker is burst free, but I don't pick it up. My Bubbler is charged, and it seems that I could put that to better use. I am pushed back from my first choice of route, but am unsplatted, so head around the back. I manage to find a couple of surprised inklings in a couple of sloshes, and nearly get a third unscathed but the Burst Bomb Rush is quite inky.

I go back and wait for the next move again, before deciding to go around the side. An Echolocator hits as the E-litre 3K waits to splat me. I have been here before, and I am sensible enough not to just keep on going, but mostly hide. And I move away rather than engaging in a pointless one-on-one battle, which actually helps me stay unsplatted. It also lets me give chase to the Rainmaker, which is heading towards our base.

The Rainmaker doesn't get far, and with the battle almost over, I pop my Bubbler for security and start sloshing ink over the Rainmaker's Shield. My Bubbler helps quite a lot, saving me from two direct hits from the E-litre 3K. And although we don't burst the Rainmakers Shield, we do enough to keep it out of yellow tentacles and secure ourselves the victory. Woomy!

Poor start turned around in Rainmaker (9-4, Tri-slosher)

11th July 2017 – 7.00 pm

Well, that dive past the Rainmaker doesn't work so well, even if I do get past a Splash Wall. And my attempt to approach the Rainmaker from behind is scuppered by an aware inkling. At least my Bubbler protects me to burst the Rainmaker out of its shield, which would be okay if I didn't then squid in to the middle of a Splat Bomb Rush. I'm sure my battle will pick up soon.

I hope a bit of height will help me, but the blue team are out of range. I head around the side as an Inkzooka fires, hoping I won't be a collateral victim, and drop down almost on top of an inkling. That inkling weirdly ignores me in favour of the Rainmaker, so I splat her in the back, and that puts me in a good position for two more splats, Bubbler helping me out. Yes, a triple-splat!

I help burst the Rainmaker's Shield (hey, the triple becomes a quad!), and push forwards to start inking turf back to green. The quad-splat helps, with the blue team all pushed back to their base, and a squidmate gets the Rainmaker past the half-way mark to give put a score on the board. I try to continue, but my Rainmaker work is sub-par for the position. Never mind.

Super-jumping doesn't get me splatted, neither does it put me in a good position. Working back around flanks an inkling, but she moves pretty good for a blue squid. By the time she's splatted, I am in the wrong place again, but I do what I can and ink some more turf. It doesn't really help with our poor position directly, but it should slow the blue team down a bit.

I get back to show my face as the Rainmaker Shield bursts, which makes it look like I'm doing my bit, and press forwards to make a path. I get right to the podium, under a Splash Wall for a splat too, but the Rainmaker doesn't come my way. That's okay, as I was getting ahead of everything, so head back to help out. And forwards to ink, and back to help out when the Splash Wall gets in my way properly.

Bah, I miss the Kelp Splatterscope on the wall, get giddy in a patch of ink, and miss the Kelp Splatterscope setting up a Killer Wail. He super-jumps away in the end, but the reason his Killer Wail was pointed towards their base is because our squidmate made an amazing dash with the Rainmaker, right in to the lead! Nice!

Even better, the Bubbler on me is not mine, so I can drop on top of the blue team recovering the Rainmaker with relative impunity. The Rainmaker's blast keeps me away, and the blue squid gets away really quickly, but you can almost smell the desperation in his ink. We regroup, catch up, and a nicely thrown Disruptor slows down his progress, for two of us to drop down for the splat.

Just a bit of defence needed now. And the best defence is an offence, so I grab the Rainmaker and, dodging under a Killer Wail, take it away from our base and towards theirs. I remember that path up the wall, so that's the way I head. I don't get too far towards their base, but I take the Rainmaker nicely away from ours. That gives us precious time to spot the final advance and prevent it.

Indeed, I sit back, still ahead of their target position, and watch what's happening. The Rainmaker is coming the way I took it, but from their side. Seeing that, I take a direct route there, heading up for some additional height, and drop down to splat the Rainmaker and end the battle. Great comeback, team!

Early lead gets a bit sloppy in Rainmaker (13-6, Tri-slosher)

11th July 2017 – 7.00 am

Hitting the side quickly, getting a half-decent Disruptor throw, and pausing to avoid a flick pays off nicely to start the battle. Two inklings under my sloshes to start with, and a third who I just about manage to keep out of range from. Heading back towards the Rainmaker sees a squidmate pick it up, so when the Echolocator on me drops I sneak around the side, quickly catching two returning splats under a Killer Wail.

But I'm getting a bit ahead of the team. I squid back to help recover the Rainmaker before pressing ahead aggressively again to ink the way. Another Disruptor hits a target, and a bit of height lets me exploit my Tri-slosher nicely. Walking in to a Seeker finally stops my mini-rampage, but not the Rainmaker, which keeps on going to the base of the plinth before being stopped.

The purple team take control of the Rainmaker, and trying to keep them from getting too far seems to have the Dynamo Roller fall off the floor. Quite how she stays here and splats me is a decent feat. The Rainmaker's been stopped, at least, but more purple is appearing on the floor. Squidding around the side for an advantage runs in to a Carbon Roller flicking her way forwards. Either that, or her reflexes are amazing.

Hitting the side proper almost gets me splatted again, but I just about manage to slosh quicker than the Luna Blaster. My squidding isn't quite as fast, as I see the Rainmaker clamber on to our side of the map. Maybe that's a good thing, as having to force the platform up gives me better sloshing capability, and a second target.

Despite our early coordination, we are now firmly on the back foot. I take the higher turf, can't quite reach the action, but manage to find somewhere safe from a Killer Wail. I still don't get to do much but distract an inkling as I drop down, but I stay safe and the Rainmaker is stopped again. I keep going the way I point, coming across a sea of purple. Perhaps inadvisably, I ink as much turf yellow as I feel I can without compromising our defence, hopefully to give us better opportunity shortly.

Inking the turf also charges my Bubbler, which comes in handy when I return to where the purple inklings look to be lurking, waiting to pounce on our Rainmaker carrier. My little manoeuvrings help us to push the Rainmaker back slightly, obviously my squidmates doing the actual work, but the purple team are gelling together nicely now. It doesn't help that I sensibly wait for a Killer Wail to end, but stand in front of the Rainmaker's blast.

More height required! Although splatting the Luna Blaster is more pressing, and doing that lets me squid on top of a wall anyway. I drop down to help splat the Rainmaker, kind of, and with a minute to go it looks like we may just hold out. And finally a little height pays off. With the purple inklings come from one direction, a squidmate cleverly heads off in the other, dropping the Rainmaker down where it requires a longer route to come back. Nice!

I wait to see which way the Rainmaker goes, either waiting for it to come to me or, as it works out, sneaking behind it for the splat. That works nicely, and just as the battle is about to end. I raise the platform to make it harder to get to me, pop my Bubbler for a bit of protection, and burst the Rainmaker and grab it to end the battle with surprising little pressure. Woomy!

More Sprinkler splats in Splat Zones (6-3, N-ZAP '89)

10th July 2017 – 7.00 pm

I want to use my N-ZAP '89's range and Sprinkler to good effect as soon as possible, so head along to the right, where I can throw the Sprinkler above the Splat Zones, and keep my range from whatever early push is coming our way. It works out for me, and for the team as a whole. We control the Splat Zones and take an early lead.

A couple of Specials start flying around, my Inkstrike being one of them, and I push up to ink some turf beyond the Splat Zones. As I do, some purple ink comes to the side, so I turn and, well, get squished. At least it wasn't a Carbon Roller. We lose the Splat Zones too, and the lead, but nothing we can't get back.

On my way back, I stumble in to an inkling who refuses to acknowledge I'm there, which is a bit weird. I end up nicely above the Splat Zones, though, but not with much ink. Not after the Sprinkler. That doesn't last long, because even though the Echolocator drops nice and quickly, thanks to my t-shirt, a Dual Squelcher bends some ink around a wall. So it goes.

Okay, now the lead looks tough to overcome. We manage to recapture the Splat Zones, which is something, and I run right in to a hiding squid, which is very satisfying. With the Splat Zones nice and teal, I skirmish a bit further up, and find a target with her back towards me. I somehow miss the jump, my legs failing me, but I make the most of the situation by splatting the Roller, before the tables are turned and I am the target again.

The way back through the Splat Zones is not safe, so I plant a Sprinkler and move the other way. That charges my Inkstrike, which I launch, bagging me a splat, and I replace the Sprinkler in a good position as we recapture the Splat Zones. I go the long way around again, avoiding engaging the Dual Squelcher at her range, and get a splat from somewhere. The Sprinkler, I imagine, nice!

I once again show that I am the master of the premature 'Nice!', trying to squeeze it in after we retake the lead but before the battle ends, but doing so just as our counter is stopped. I can't say I mind, particularly as we're in the lead, and also because I get a second Sprinkler splat with the same Sprinkler. Nice!

Another Inkstrike helps recapture the Splat Zones, and I squid to them to replace my Sprinkler. But it isn't necessary. We turned the battle around, and secured the knockout victory. Woomy!